Kara Powell and Brad Griffin argue that intergenerational relationship is a key role in cultivating what they call sticky faith. Griffin and Powell suggest that in order to implement intergenerational relationships, students must have some type of involvement in all-church worship.
My gut reaction after reading this article was a mixture of anxiety and doubt. My brain was flooded with questions based on my failed attempts to foster intergenerational relationships in a worship setting. My biggest question was: How are traditional and older churches going to make all worship gatherings youth friendly?
For example, during my first year in youth ministry, I wanted more youth involved in our Sunday morning worship services. For a number of months I attempted to persuade the youth to attend big church. One Sunday Stephanie, a junior in high school, finally agreed to attend. However, this was Stephanie’s third time to church, so she was a little unfamiliar with the church culture. Stephanie arrived to church with her lip and eyebrow ring and a really low-cut top and jeans. In a matter of five minutes, one of the older men confronted me in the foyer, sternly telling me that Stephanie needed to remove her lip ring and change her clothes. I told him I was more concerned with her being at church than I was with her piercings. He didn’t like my response.
Powell and Griffin reiterated that high school seniors don’t feel supported by adults in their congregations. Essentially, adults wanted nothing to do with teens.
Mid to late adolescents already believe that few if any adults really care about them, so why put them in an environment where this idea will only be reinforced? Stephanie’s small-group leader had to spend weeks with her trying to persuade her that Christian adults really do care about her, regardless of her piercings and apparel.
I decided that I had to pause, zoom out and not let my anxiety and doubt crush the intergenerational relationships in worship service suggestion. I agree with Powell’s and Griffin’s conclusions, so why was I being so cynical? I had some bad experiences trying to quickly foster intergenerational relationships in a worship setting, but this doesn’t mean I ignore the profound power intergenerational relationships gives the faith journey of a teen.
Then I decided to reread the article, which led me to feel empowered and hopeful again. My emotions fizzled out, and I began to see the bigger picture. I had to remind myself why intergenerational relationships are so vital for youth workers to cultivate.
First, youth workers have to pray to the Lord of the harvest. The Lord is the one who draws leaders into our ministry (Matthew 9:38). Praying for more adults to get it is one of the hardest things to remember to do. I had to constantly remind myself that the Spirit is the one who transforms the hard hearts of adults who don’t care about students.
Second, fostering intergenerational relationships is more about mindset than it is about programming. It is about attitude. My job as a youth worker is to mobilize God’s people to do the work of ministry to young people. Youth workers are theologically responsible to train all generations to care for students. I realized I needed to spend a lot more time convincing more adults to care for kids.
My mistake with Stephanie was that I was convincing the students to attend Sunday morning service and not convincing adults why students needed to attend Sunday morning service. Imagine if I’d had multiple conversations with the older people in my church on why all types of students needed to be in church. I probably could have prevented that heated confrontation in the foyer about Stephanie’s piercings and clothing.
God’s people are called and compelled to serve. Youth workers must convince adults they need to serve the next generation. Youth workers must approach everyone with an opportunity to work with this incredible next generation. Youth ministries need to convince everyone that working with students is vital to their faith. Not only will adults change the lives of teens, but the teens will change the life of an adult.
Kara and Brad’s article led me to a few questions:
• How do we get adults and students to worship together if (older) adults believe Sunday morning church is more for them and not teens?
• When trying to cultivate intergenerational worship, who should compromise the most? Teens, adults or both?
• What role does the senior leadership play in trying to foster intergenerational ministry?
• Should teens be encouraged to bring their youthfulness into the church service, or should they conform to adult culture?
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